Conversation On Our Way to the Apple Store

Dave: Try to look alternative so we blend in.

Me: Well I'm wearing a scarf and glasses.

Dave: I don't have a scarf.

I'm Taking a Stand

We live off Hwy 80 which means (for those of you who don't live around here) during ski season our commute home sucks A** because everyone and their dog goes up to Tahoe. It's particularly bad near holidays. Tonight my boss (who is a very nice lady) said we could leave early yay. Even though we left at about 2:30 it still took us an hour and a half to get home. At one point we had to stop to get gas and while we were at the gas station I observed one of the traffic causing idiots carrying around ski poles while wearing flip flops. Alright I think now this trend has officially gone to far. Now I have no issue with flip flops, I wear em, but there are times when they are not appropriate. I would think that traveling to somewhere with snow would obviously be one of em but apparently I need to be the voice of reason. Also at the office, I'm sorry but rubber shoes are not professional. Even if they are nicer (perhaps leather) if you could wear them to the beach you should not wear them to the office. And finally not on formal occasions. If you want to wear flip flops with a sun dress or jeans by all means go for it but if you're going somewhere nice, like a restaurant that has table cloths the same rules apply as do in an office environment. I know I'm stepping on some toes here (no pun intended) but someone needed to say it. If you an offender I've been judging you for years and saying snide things when you can't hear and will continue to do so until you cease and desist.

Well That Was Fun

Actually my insane plan to be the holiday hostess of the year turned out to be my brilliant plan the be the bestest holiday hostess ever. I wasn't stressed out and didn't wind up crying at the end of the night (it's happened before, draw your own conclusions). Everyone had a good time there were many many presents we ate a disgusting amount of food and enjoyed the resultant nausea. The only downside is Dave and I are both completely exhausted but luckily we've got the weekend to recuperate.

I promise to force Dave to get the pictures up and running. Actually I doubt it will be a problem since I got him a digital picture frame for his desk at work and you know he's going to want to put some of the new pics on in. Along with the frame I gave him some clothes, which he needed badly and a new copy of Office Space on DVD because the old one was broken and I think it's a household necessity.

Dave got me a necklace, a bracelet, a DVD of Wall-E and a new ipod touch so you can look forward to more posts about my musical preferences (actually I've got a new list started, you know your excited).

Strangely though I'm completely sober my only two teammates who came to work today convinced me to sing them a song. I feel both embarrassed an a little high.

A Few Things and Merry Christmas

#1. The song Noticed by Mute Math sounds like the Police. Hu that's weird!

#2. If you only listen to the first 5 seconds every banjo song ever recorded sounds exactly the same. No seriously it's a hilarious experiment go to i-tunes or Rhapsody or samples on Amazon.

#3. I worked on the pictures last night honestly. But I couldn't get in to Flickr. I even caved and tried to upload them through the blogger app even though they keep coming up in random order when I do that but our desktop is like 5 years old which is 92 in computer years and I just kept getting an error. I promise I'll find a way to get the pics up but I guess it's not going to be today.

#4. Um I'm a really bad friend and forgot to even send an email to the woman who's been one of my best friends since I was 4 (seriously next year we will have known each other 30 years) on her birthday which was yesterday so HAPPY LATE BIRTHDAY CAMILLA!

#5. Here are some more fabulous Christmas videos I found on youtube when I should have been doing something productive. I hope you all have a great Christmas even if you don't celebrate a day off is always good.

I Suppose I Shouldn't Laugh But....

I have tracking software that tells me how many people are visiting my blog, where they come from (both geographically and link wise), and search words that people used.

I just found out that more people have found this site through searches for "Madness Intervention" than anything else.

I'm not laughing at the people who have a legitimate situation that they are trying to find help for but you have to admit it's ironic.

Don't Worry Pics Are On The Way

I know I said we'd try to process the birthday pics last night but last night Dave had to go to the store to get the MEAT (it's in caps in his head so it's in caps here too) for our next event in the marathon O' celebrations, Christmas eve.

Actually Christmas eve should be fun as it's just Dave's two brothers and their wives and they're pretty much the only people we hang out with any way so this will be more like a normal Saturday night than a holiday celebration. My two Sisters in law and I will drink far more than we should and the boys will ignore it and pretend that we haven't gotten really annoying. They're good men. Oh and to make sure everyone is in the proper mood we'll probably turn on the DVR and play all the Christmas episodes of South Park 'cause we're like that.

Anyway hopefully we'll get the pics processed tonight and sent out to the family and into my Flikr account so I can post 'em here as well.

Did You Know I Was Insane?

You did? Why didn't you give me a heads up? It came as a complete surprise to me when I realized I'd planed to host 3 events in my home this week. I knew I'd planed these things it just didn't occur to me that they were all within 4 days of each other. Sure I knew Christmas eve and Christmas day were together and I knew Fiona was born near Christmas but......umm I have no way to finish that sentence.

Any way the first event was Fiona's 1st birthday yesterday and it went very well. Fiona loved all the attention (I wonder where she got that from?) and didn't ruin the white dress I put her in while destroying the chocolate cupcake I made her. We took about 5,000,000 pictures and I'm hoping to have them processed tonight so I post a few. Of coarse the one I'm particularly excited about is the one of her hugging the cat which is not so much birthday related but does illustrate the strange love/terrify relationship they have.

I'm sure I will also have pics from our Christmas extravaganza in a few days.

A Little Glimpse Inside My Mind

About a year ago Dave and I were watching TV and some commercial started a chain of thoughts in my head that ended with me turning to Dave and saying, "Ya know what movie they should totally remake, except I guess it wasn't really a movie since it was made for TV but still it would be cool?" (sadly that's actually the way I talk).

Without even a pause he responded "V?"

"YES!" That was exactly what I was thinking.

I found this extremely funny at the time because it just shows that he is the perfect husband for me as he understands the warped workings of my mind and agrees with me.

Saturday evening we couldn't find anything on TV so we decided to rent a movie on line and what to our wondering eyes did appear? V was available so we downloaded it and started watching. We finally got to the end last night.

It's still pretty good SciFi but man that is some of the worst acting I've ever seen and randomly at the very end they replaced one of the actresses with a woman that doesn't look anything like her. It was the best worst movie I've seen in a long time. I think we have a new Christmas tradition.

I'm BaaaAaaaak!

So Work has been INSANE! But I'm getting to learn some new stuff so that's cool and Sunday is Fiona's 1st birthday (Can you believe it) so we've been dealing with birthday/Christmas preparations not to mention the normal care and feeding of Fiona every night and you know what? I AM TIRED! Any way I should start having some time to attempt to be witty for your Internet enjoyment and I hope to resume my normal updating schedule. In the mean time here is a youtube video of one of my favorite Christmas songs. It also reminds me of my good friend Christy whom I call Nugget (I don't remember why). Hi Nugget Merry Christmas!

The FBI Files

A couple years ago I worked at a bank, as a matter of fact I was the manager. Unfortunately there was a problem with a large amount of money disappearing and of coarse this had to be investigated. I'm not sure if it was standard procedure or because the bank was located on a military base but the FBI were involved. I had to give a statement both because I was the manager and because I was one of the employees who could have taken the money. I didn't of coarse have anything to do with it and eventually we did figure out what had happened but that's not the point of the story. I arrived at the MP office and was introduced to the people who would be investigating the incident including the FBI agent who flashed his badge just like on TV and I giggled and admitted that I thought it was kind of cool to meet an FBI agent then he blushed and said, "I just made agent that was the first time I got to flash my badge" he looked just like a little boy and was not at all intimidating.

It's a Conspiracy!

I just want coffee is that to much to ask? We didn't have any cream so I didn't have coffee at home thinking I'd just go over to Starbucks when I got to work. When I got to Starbucks they didn't have any cream either so I threw away the cup of coffee I'd paid for before discovering this fact. So I went in to the little deli place in my building and they have cream (hallelujah!) but only French Roast which tastes like dirt. So now I'm irritated and tired and I have no hope of coffee. I feel like crying.

Check Me Out Sneaking a Post in

On our way to get coffee Dave and I saw a really big bird (some sort of raptor but the only one I know by site is the peregrine falcon and this wasn't one of those) sitting on the banister of the office building we were entering. It was maybe 8 feet from us and it was probably 2 feet high. This was totally one of those why don't we have the camera moments. I was so cool thought I'd share.

Santa Claus Is Coming to Town

Sunday we took Fiona to meet Santa. Last year we skipped the traditional Santa photo since she was only 4 days old on Christmas and we only came home from the hospital on the 24th (best Christmas present I ever got). Any way we were pleased that she didn't cry and although this is an unusual pose it's very Fiona so we like it.

I have to say that despite the general trend toward ghettoness the Solano mall has a pretty good Santa. I prefer a Santa with a real beard*.
Due to work constraints posting may be a little sporadic to non existent into the middle of next week but I'll do my best to get something up a few times so please be patient with me.

*It is not the intention of this blogger to imply in any way that the Santa at the mall is not the real Santa, only to observe that real beards are better than fake ones. This blogger is a firm believer in Santa and anyone who tried to state any opinion other than the obvious truth of his existence will be given a raspberry and possibly the finger depending on age or ability to negatively harm said blogger.

This Has Been Stuck In My Head-Enjoy!

Funny Man

Our fortunes from lunch and Dave's response to them.

Dave's cookie: A Cheerful letter or message is on it's way to you

***Dave's response- Great I'm gonna get spam telling me I won a Walmart gift card


My cookie: You like to know that your presence is felt and appreciated

***Dave's response- The cookie just called you insecure

Next She'll be Dancing

Fiona has learned to stand up by herself (while holding on to something). Unfortunately she's decided the bathtub is the best place to practice this new skill.

Tastes Like Chicken

Printed on the side of Maruchan cup o' noodle -"Handle with care especially when serving children"


Hmmm I didn't know it came in children flavor. And why would that require extra care? Oh rite, because you don't want any one to know your eating children. Makes perfect sense now.

What Country Doesn't Have Burger King?

Today we witnessed another one of those "things that make you go hmmmm" scenarios. There were these two ladies from some Spanish speaking country at Burger King who were so excited to be there they were asking some guy coming out to take their picture in front of the sign. I was not aware that the Emeryville Burger King was a tourist destination.

Good Eating

We went to lunch on Sunday. Fiona eats real food now so we gave her food from our plates. I gave her vegetables from my salad. Dave gave her french fries.

How Unobservant Am I?

I didn't realise it was December until just now.