All the things one has forgotten scream for help in dreams.-Elias Canetti

I have a fairly nasty cold. I thought I'd set a couple things to post the last few days. Turns out I never even wrote them. Crazy fever dreams. So yeah sorry 'bout that.

If you have to be in a soap opera try not to get the worst role.-Judy Garland

I dreamed that the soap opera I was on was being canceled. The other three people in the cast were all upset but I told them it would be fine because we were going to get picked up by Telemundo. Now we just needed to learn Spanish.

I don't even care what that means. It made me giggle.

Youll never get away with this, you Martian!-Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (1964)

I had a total Zombie apocalypse dream last night, which is annoying because I'm over the Zombie thing. It's been done to death (no pun intended).


But I started wondering. All the martian movies in the 50's and 60's were a metaphor for the cold war and fear of Communism.

What are all the Zombie movies/books/comics/haiku (honestly google Zombie Haiku) a metaphor for? I mean let's face it no mater who you blame things aren't exactly happy shiny for everyone at the moment.

Your thoughts?

You see things; and you say, 'Why?' But I dream things that never were; and I say, 'Why not?-George Bernard Shaw

I dreamed I was buying panties for the cat because he'd outgrown the ones he already had.



I don't even want to know what that means.

I have a memory like an elephant. In fact, elephants often consult me.-Nole Coward

I had a dream that there was a herd of tiny elephants in my house. They were about the size of Gambit. They were cute and kinda fuzzy. I was sad when I woke up 'cause that would have been cool.

Dreams are illustrations... from the book your soul is writing about you.-Marsha Norman

Do you ever have one of those dreams that seems like it would make a great book or movie if only you could figure out the rest of the story and had any writing talent?



Those make me sad because I can never figure out the rest of the story and don't have any writing talent so they just drift away and are lost forever.

I have a "carpe diem" mug and, truthfully, at six in the morning the words do not make me want to seize the day. They make me want to slap a dead poet

I was having a dream that Fiona was waking up and being whiny and obnoxious interspersed with images of Dave getting ready for work. So when Fiona started crying and got up over an hour early while Dave was getting ready I was confused to discover that I'm psychic.

Sigh today will require lots of coffee.



Note: Again no room for the credit in my title. It was said by Joanne Sherman.

In a dream you are never eighty.-Anne Sexton

You know how people sometimes start conversations with "I had the weirdest dream the other night?"

Yeah...I had the worlds dullest dream the other night.

No really. I dreamed about brushing my teeth. While I brushed I reminded myself to use the mouth wash for a full 30 seconds for maximum germ killing efficiency.

What the F was the point of that?

Do not free a camel of the burden of his hump; you may be freeing him from being a camel.-Gilbert K. Chesterton

I woke up in the middle of the night and there was something in our room. I was all "what the f**k is that" then Dave moved so I realised he's awake too and I said, "Is that a freaking giraffe?" he says "No, it's a camel."

Dude a freaking camel in our house. How the heck did it get there? How'd it even wind up in Fairfield, we don't even have a zoo? I was understandably confused and a little frightened. Was this some sort of daring burglary?

So Dave chased it down the hall in to the garage and I went to call......who do you call when there's a camel in your house? The Humane Society? The A.S.P.C.A.? I don't know freaking P.E.T.A.? Who ever would come and get this camel could have it as far as I was concerned, maybe a BBQ place. The whole time I was making calls and explaining the situation I was thinking "This is going to make an awesome blog post!"

I was very disappointed when I woke up and discovered that it was only a very vivid dream. It probably means something nutty too, like I secretly want to take up taxidermy.

I tried so hard, and got so far, but in the end it doesn't even matter-In the End, Linkin Park

Wacky Dream



So I walked in to my room which in this case was a dorm room (complete with room mate) to find one of my favorite bands practicing to perform for my nephew's first birthday. Dave was helping them do all the technical stuff to set up and the lead singer was jumping up and down on my bed. I decided that this was not a good moment to point out to Dave that I have a giant crush on said singer (in my bed sigh). Dave hands me a fancy schmancy white microphone and asks me to bring it to the stage. I know, like you do in dreams, that they could not perform without this particular mic. So I tried to head to the stage but well that's when it turned in to a frustration dream where I couldn't find the stage and then I found the wrong band (my nephew was having quite the rock n roll first birthday) and then I found the stage, which was on the deck at the house I grew up in in Oakland (why didn't I just look there to begin with?) but the band wasn't there yet and I was starting to feel like a total tool carrying this stupid mic like the Olympic torch and then.....the alarm went off.

All the things one has forgotten scream for help in dreams.-Elias Canetti

One of the things I hate the most about being sick are the fever dreams. I don't know if everyone gets these but I have horrible anxiety dreams when I'm sick. My Mom still laughs at one I had as a teenager where I had to make tiny lawnmowers out of barbie body parts. I remember another from when I was in elementary school where I had to sort stacks of paper but my thumbs were huge (that one still upsets me). Here are a few I had during this recent bought of grossness (yay child in daycare bringing home all kinds of fun things).


1. I had to build video clips out of my cold. This one was probably because I fell asleep while Dave was watching Tosh.0.

2. I was moving in to my new room in my parents house and I was irritated because in an effort to be helpful they had tried to decorate it for me with some random unattractive crap*. I was trying to undo the damage taking down everything I could including a couple pictures that actually were up in my room when I was a kid and I always hated and I was getting pissed ('cause I'm generally so calm and non tantrumy) but when I got to the bed they put together for me and discovered it was a toddler bed I kinda lost it and started throwing things and yelling at my brother who came in to calm me down (I felt like a dick when I woke up).


3. Some superhero clad weirdo stole a...I don't know what it was...water ski thingy from a friend from work and filled it with used oil. Because I watch so many forensic shows I figured they could trace to oil back to the vehicle so we didn't want to pour it out. The problem was apparently friend from work was planing some sort of spectacular stunt and had flares all over the place and we had t remove them without blowing up. The dogs barked and woke me up so I'm not sure how that was gonna end.


*This part could totally happen we do not have the same taste. One time a couple years ago I was at their house for dinner we were discussing the fallout in some family we knew when the parent died and the kids all started fighting over the estate. My Dad made a joke about me having to wait a while for "all this". I looked at him like he was crazy and said "I don't want any of this junk."

Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.-Chili Davis

Last night I had a dream that I was trying to give Dave his birthday present but he was ignoring me, I was especially annoyed since I actually bought him something he asked for, which I usually don't because he asks for weird computer parts and things like that that I have no clue how to find let alone how to pick a good one.

It wasn't until I was on my way to work that I realized it was just a dream, I hadn't given him his gift, and I didn't even say happy birthday. Ummm oops.

Cell phone conversation

Dave: Hello

Me: So I'm a horrible person and forgot to tell you happy birthday.

Dave: Oh yeah

Me: Happy birthday. I love you.

Dave: Love you too

Me: Okay bye click

Another Example of My Warped Mind

I had a dream that someone I knew had a child that was very ill (not entierly sure who). The child was so sick that the Make a Wish Foundation came to grant them a wish. Only instead of getting to go to Disneyland or getting to meet their favorite sports hero they got a trip to.....the supermarket.

Dream Interpretation

Hey Roses & Rave thanks for the feed back on that last post. Hopefully soon I'll be able to explain why some of Rave's comments were uncannily on target.

Also last nights dream was much nicer. Salacious so I'm not gonna tell you the details but quite pleasant.

Deeply Scared Psyche

I had an awfull dream last night. Seriously unplesant so if you're having a nice cheerfull day you might want to skip this one. On the other hand if you feel you need a downer or you're just morbidly curious by all means read on.

Dave and I were leaving work very late (a nightmare by itself) on our way to the car. For some reason I was very pregnant (I'm totally not, don't get excited). Next to our office was a huge closed hotel that Disney had just bought and were refurbishing to open as a Haunted Hotel themed hotel. On the very top was one of those rotating bars but it wasn't moving. On top of that on the roof was a lounge area for the bar. We were walking to our car and we could see that there were a bunch of people on the roof. I wasn't sure if they were construction people or people who had broken in. (Okay here's the bad part, turn back now) Suddenly they all started jumping off and the bodies were landing all around us in the parking lot. One landed right behind our car and I was trying to figure out how to back out without running over it. We didn't want to talk to the cops (not sure why) and were trying to make a get away when the alarm went off. That was not a good way to start my morning.

I really really don't want to know what that means. Clearly I'm deeply crazy.

Psychic Connection?

Last night I had a nightmare about Fiona choking and I woke up with my heart trying to beat it's way out of my chest. Now that's unpleasant but not really worth mentioning. After all what Mom doesn't have the occasional nightmare regarding her child's safety? She's totally fine by the way.

The weird thing is as I was waking up and dealing with the painful heart pounding I heard Dave mumbling in his sleep clearly having his own nightmare. A few seconds latter he woke up said, "I forgot to set the burglar alarm." and went and did just that.

I asked him this morning and he had indeed been having a nightmare at the exact same time as I was although on a different subject. Either that was a really strange coincidence or I should not make stir fry chicken with brown rice and peas again.

A Few Thoughts On My Day Off

Why was I having a dream that my friend Puddin needed to burrow my sheets?

Even taking a toddler to the Doctor is better fun than going to work.

Should I die my hair?

If we won the lottery what would I give everyone?

Aww crud! I should probably get something for MY Dad. Hmmmm bookstore?.....Mmmmmm bookstore!

Shhh Don't Tell Dave

This one's for my SIL (AB) She'll know why.



I dreamed we were living in a new house. We hadn't just moved in but it didn't feel like home yet either. Unfortunately it was haunted. Normally this would be kind of cool but this ghost wouldn't let me use the bathroom. Every time I tried to use the toilet it would turn on the taps and squirt me with watter and if I tried to shower it would open the shower curtain and throw toiletries at me. Also for some reason it was fascinated by Fiona. Finally I got pissed and clutched Fiona to me and screamed, "Stay the F*#k away from my baby!". Of coarse it was about now that I realised I was actually in a restaurant and had screamed at my friends. They apparently felt this was rude although I thought they should be more understanding. We all went our separate ways but I was still irritated until Robert Pattinson showed up and took me on a date. That cheered me up.

Kitty P.I.

When the alarm went off I was having a dream about a cat detective. All film noir like but feline.

It's really to bad I can't draw because that would make a great comic book don't you think?



Note: I'm having some technical difficulties with scheduling posts. Sorry for any confusion. I think I've got it fixed now.

Weird But True

Ya know how I always know it's time to change jobs?

I start having anxiety dreams about taking the cat to work with me. This has been true for 4 jobs and two cats.